One does not simply review The Hobbit.  Reviewing this movie means explaining the other movies that art part of the Lord of the Rings Trilogy, explaining why people liked this movie and didn’t like this movie and why you should like it anyway despite all the haters (haters are people who don’t like something just to not like it.  It’s a lot easier to complain about a situation than it is to fix it)

So let’s jump right into it.  The Hobbit is a prequel to The Lord of the Rings trilogy.  That means it took place before all the other movies.  If you were a movie your parents would be the prequel to you.  Your parents prequel was your grandparents.

The movie starts out way before any of other movies take place, back where there was a kingdom ruled by dwarves full of rare jewels and metals.  The dwarves in the area mined out the caves with all of these rare good deep into the earth.  All the while, the good king of the drawves is beginning to start take more and more of the gold and other riches for himself.  Eventually this becomes a problem because dragons love riches and they don’t like dwards.  Eventually Smaug- a really grumpy greedy dragon comes by and instead of being civil about wanting the gold burns the village and everyone it runs into to make everyone run away from their home country.

Now the dwarves with no home have no choice but to wander off and find a place to stay all the while fighting off orcs (who are a lot like dragons- they just can’t seem to get along with anyone).  In one of these battles the dwarf king is slain and Thorin- the prince of dwarves takes over as king and leads his kingdom to a temporary place to call home but everyone really yearns for their home.

A little while later, in a peaceful valley lives a hobbit (they’re like small people but with hairy feet and friendly attitudes) named Bilbo Baggins living a quiet life in his hut.  Until one day a man named Gandalf comes by and says that he’s going on an adventure.  To which Bilbo bravely replies “No”.  Closes the door on Gandalf and goes back to living his peaceful life.

The next part is hard to understand so I broke it down into a metaphor.  Picture your at your house eating Doritos (if you don’t like Dorritos think of a snack you do like.) and playing videogames all quietly at your house.  Suddenly you hear a knock at the door and it’s one of your friends.  Well you weren’t expecting any company but you let him in anyway.  Your friend turns off your videogame and plays another one and starts eating your dorritos.  Before you get a chance to ask why, someone knocks on the door and there’s two more of your friends at the door who do the same thing.  By the end of the night you have twelves people eating your Doritos and playing all your videogames.  Now picture that instead of Doritos it’s all of your food by the fridge load and instead of playing videogames it’s breaking furniture and instead of friends it’s dwarves you’ve never met in your life and that’s what happens to Frodo.

Eventually Gandalf comes and explains to Bilbo that these dwarfs are all going on an adventure and Bilbo would be going too.  To which Bilbo bravely replies “No!”.  But by the end of the night, Bilbo begins to think about what life would be like if he didn’t have his comfy house with his comfy videogames and Doritos and decides that he wants to help these dwarfs get their home back.  So Bilbo at the last second joins up with them and goes on an crazy adventure.

Running into trolls who want to eat them, goblins who want to capture them and orcs who want to kill them.  There’s even mountains that start moving on their own.  There’s also wizards with crazy magical powers, elves with pointy ears and rings with cool effects.  So believe me, even though the movie is three hours long you’ll wish it was longer by the end (except for the elf village part, you’ll wish that ended 20 minutes before it started).  That’s the good about the movie.

Now, everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I respect that (and so should you).  But I want to talk a little about the critiques about this movie (that means the reviews that suggest there being deep problems with this movie).

13 Main Characters.

To understand why this movie is a little hard to review, picture your grampa telling you a story about life “back in his day” and he lists off a bunch of people you don’t know and you don’t have any paper to write it all down on.  And while you are trying to keep up with all the people in his story you have to keep track of what he’s talking about, where he is going and you have no idea where the story is going to end.  Watching The Hobbit to some people is a lot like that.  But the thing you have to remember is that:

If you remember the names Gandalf, Bilbo and Thorin you can see the entire movie and understand 99% of the important things going on.  The little details are there for the people who read the book and are looking to see their favorite characters discussed.  It’s not to say they aren’t important but names aren’t the most important thing to remember.  Sometimes you might meet people in real life you only run into for a few minutes, never catch their name and think, “What a great person!”.  Just because you don’t remember someones name doesn’t mean you don’t think they’re great.  But trust me, remembering names makes people feel special.  No one wants to be thought of as “That one guy” or “That one girl”.   But since this is a movie and you’re (probably) not going to meet these dwarves and hobbits in real life it’s not going to be a problem.

Too Long

A lot of people complain about how long this movie is.  Don’t watch this movie if you’re in a hurry to get out of it.  You ever been at a friends house and you didn’t want to leave even though you were there all day?  If you go into this movie with that attitude you’ll love it.  If you go into this movie with a bad attitude because of how long it is, you’ll leave it the same way.  I don’t want to get deep on you but everything is about attitude.  If you go in with a bad attitude you’ll leave with one, and vis versa.  I know it’s long, but that doesn’t mean it’s boring.

Not as good

Great deal of people are complaining about this movie strictly because some think this movie “Isn’t as good as the others”.  To me, I think it’s not very fair for people to be comparing all these movies to one another since they all do something different for the series.  Let me put it a different way:  Imagine if you were really good at math but you weren’t good at writing.  Now what if your teacher came up to you during writing class and said, “Your not good at this, so you must be bad at everything”  That would seem really unfair.  She didn’t even consider how good you were at running, multiplication tables or any of that.  She just up and judged you.  That’s what movie critics do to this movie.  They wanted this movie to be just like all the others but it wasn’t and that made them not like it.  Just because something isn’t the same as the other doesn’t mean it’s bad!

What we can learn from all this

Obviously you’re opinion and my opinion are not always going to be the same.  That’s what makes us human (and me a chameleon) is that we are all different.  You may end up agreeing with me and liking this movie or you may end up thinking you don’t like this movie.  But the point is let it be YOUR OPINION.  Don’t let negative reviews weigh your decision on how good a movie is. Sometimes even your friends try to convince you their opinion of something even when you don’t agree.  That’s also known as peer pressure, it’s also known as jumping on the bandwagon.  Your opinion, popular or not is your opinion and you should appreciate it for what it is.  So let people know your opinion (if they ask) and don’t let them decide it for you.  You are your own person, and so is your opinion.  Of course that could just be MY opinion.

In light of a lot of things.  I am pleased to announce two big announcements!

1.  I’m back, there will from here on out be at least one weekly update!

2.  I’ve decided in light of recent events that I will be donating half (50%) of all my profits to St. Jude’s hospital.  It took me a great deal of thinking but I know I’ve made the right choice.  I could go into further detail but I don’t want to bore you with all the reasons why.  Basically, I wanted a charity that I could really believe in.  This seems like one.  Anyway, back to updates!  The Hobbit review should be up this afternoon!

Hurray!!  Two weeks later than I thought it would be but it’s finally all here!  The Comics, Store and the Lonely Lonely Chameleon Reviews are all up and running good to go!  The Facebook like pages are up and everything looks to be in order!  I hope you enjoy what this website has to offer!  I’ve put my heart into making this site look somewhat nice so hopefully you find it as interesting as I do!  I will be putting up posts weekly with new reviews, new comics and new art and sometime…new eBooks!  Maybe one day I’ll even make them real paper books!

But one day at a time for now!  Support the website and I’l keep watering it so it can grow!  This is going to be a great week!  I can feel it!  : )

Hey everyone.  I know no one knows about this site yet (still!)  But I think after tomorrow I should be able to get all of the few kinks out of the site and have everyone able to explore the whole site with no problems!  Better yet I’m almost done with the store site so you can purchase all PBPanda stuff you could want.  Bundle packages and pictures will come with free copy of both books too!  Also for anyone who so wishes you may donate to PBPanda directly by clicking on the Paypal button.  Anyway…I’m getting really tired really quick.  Never stay up this late everyone!

I had my friend help write this review!  It might seem a little different from the other ones but that doesn’t make it any less cool than the others!  So please keep that in mind and enjoy!

When I first saw the preview for Wreck-it Ralph, I was pumped and couldn’t wait to see it, and for good reason. Video games being the base theme was already enough to get my attention!  As you may or may not know I love videogames! (See below!)

I’m gonna review ’em!

Sponsored by Dunder Mifflin

As you may guess being a Disney film, this movie is rated PG.  So you might need a parent to explain small things but you’ll get it. Almost all the rest!
At the beginning is a mini movie called Paperman!  Which was a nice little surprise, seeing as that’s usually “DisneyPixar’s” thing, The film itself is pretty sound, one of those black and white silent films in olden days (Way before any of us were born) of Manhattan. You get a real clear understanding for the main character throughout this short. The one thing I will say is about half way through it gets a little too silly for my tastes, and I thought it might’ve lost me, but the climax definitely makes up for it so I don’t want to complain too much!  I know a lot of you probably don’t like love scenes so you might think it’s gross at times but bear with it, it’s fun to watch even just for all the paper floating around!

Also sponsored by Revlon

Now onto the actual movie:

Wrecking all poor expectations!

He’s a lovable guy- honest.

Wreck-it Ralph is a ill-tempered mountain man that day in and day out attempts to destroy an apartment building, only to be rebuilt by Fix-It Felix Jr.  shortly after.  Whenever Felix does this he is awarded a gold medal for “being the good guy!” (Personally, I believe this arcade game is a huge throwback to the original “Donkey Kong”).  And after Thirty years of this, Ralph doesn’t want to be known as “just the bad guy” anymore.

A self-help group for all of the “bad guys” of videogames.

Did I mention this is all taking place in an arcade machine?!  That’s right this entire movie is about arcade games and the characters inside them!

Ralph giving food out to those less fortunate. See? I told you he was a good guy! Even though he’s a “bad guy”

Getting back on track Wreck-It Ralph goes on an adventure through different characters in all sorts of different arcade games- including some well known arcade characters like Zhangief, Sonic, Bowser, and Qbert (He might be a little old for some of you to remember) till Ralph ends up earning a golden medal in another arcade game- just to lose it.  His precious gold medal ends up in the hands of a little girl named Vanellope von Schweetz who is part of an arcade game named “Sugar Rush”- a racing game filled with whacky characters and go-karts.

I feel like I should be going to the dentist just looking at all this.

Vanellope von Schweetz is another misfit in her own arcade game because she is “glitchy” (that means she has problems staying in the same place, she jumps around unintentionally) and wants to use the gold medal that Ralph earned to be respected in her game.  Eventually the two decide to work together reluctantly to race in Sugar Rush so Vanellope can be a respected member of the game and Ralph can go back with his medal.

An unlikely duo team up!

All sorts of crazy, whacky, silly, funny things happen in the midst of this.  Some of them sad too!  Even if you don’t know anything about videogaming culture you will absolutely love this movie!  The characters Ralph, Vanellope, Felix, and several other character who I will leave out to avoid spoilers (that means giving away the story.) are phenomenal to watch.  All of them have their own personalities and you can relate to all of them a lot- especially Ralph and Vanellope.

Fix-It Felix Jr. and Sergeant Calhoun, A match made in heaven.

I can’t emphasize how funny this movie is.  Ralph is funny just with all his wise-cracks.  Vanellope is so frustrating sometimes it’s hilarious.  Felix and his “companion” interactions (that means hanging out with each other) are worth the theater ticket by themselves.  And while these two below are side characters- I liked these characters more than anyone else.  I never thought donuts would make me laugh so hard.

Never will you like two donuts more. Never.

By the end of the movie I was laughing, I was crying, I was so happy I saw this film.  Out of all the films I’ve reviewed as of yet- this was by far my favorite.  Because as I’ve mentioned before- I’m a big nerd when it comes to videogames.  And this movie has so many videogame references and easter eggs (that means hidden messages) I’m still trying to right now figure out all of them.  To name a few without spoiling too much:

A lot of faces I didn’t expect to see in a Disney movie- ever.

1.  If you are at all knowledgeable (If you know a lot) about the videogame Street Fighter, you’ll see several of it’s casts in the background.  This list includes Chun-Li, Ryu, Ken, Zhangief, Cammy and M.Bison!

For how difficult it was to find this picture. I can’t believe how Disney managed to get both of them together.

2.  If you know anything about Mario (The videogame plumber) you’ll notice two princesses that look a lot like Princess Peach and Princess Daisy!  And of course Bowser!

Hate it or love her, you can’t deny how cool the art for this game was.

3.  If you have completed the well-played, and well-loved videogame Final Fantasy 7, you will noticed some graffiti on the wall that says “Aeris Lives”

There is a ton more too!  But I just want to name a few so you can find the rest!

But even if you aren’t into cameos (that means seeing characters that you didn’t expect!) this movie also is cool just because of the animation.  Every character acts and functions the same way they would in the videogame.  If they only walk jumpy in the videogame- they walk jumpy in the movie.  The people who designed this movie went above and beyond for the videogamers.

Mid-Bottom

And even if you aren’t into videogames- it isn’t a requirement to enjoy everything this movie has to offer.  It’s a lot like how you don’t have to read “The Hobbit” to enjoy the movie- but I’m sure it would help.  This movies story line is excellent.  There doesn’t feel like any part of this movie that seems slow or too fast.  My only complaint is that I would like to see more.  Who knows- maybe we will see a sequel sometime.

Don’t you let me down Bilbo!

So to sum everything up:

-The short at the beginning won’t be loved by everyone since it is a little mushy- but it makes up with all the mush with the cool effects!

-Wreck It Ralph is super funny and awesome for anyone who sees it.

-Knowing stuff about videogames helps- but it isn’t needed to enjoy this movie.

-Stay after the credits if you want to see extra references to other videogames!

I could talk circles about this movie (that means I could talk too much about this movie) but I won’t.  I want to- but I won’t.  I’m sure if you see it you will be the same way.  I don’t think there has been a movie quite like this ever- and I was worried they might mess it up but they didn’t.  Wreck-It Ralph is awesome.  And it get’s a gold medal from me!

I’m gonna love em